Title: Bonus Lesson: The use of I statements in essays
Course: Advanced Composition for the Digital Age SP14 > Section: Unit 2: Education Essay

Find out why you really don't have to refer to yourself very often in your writing.

Writing a Persuasive Essay

Unfortunately, when you were taught to write, there were some bad habits instilled in you. This is especially true when it comes to writing essays. Now what I'm going to say may shock some of you so you may want to sit down for this.

Avoid referring to yourself in your essays. I know that it was something you were probably taught to do when you were younger. In fact, someone may have explicitly told you, "Use I Statements," or "You should introduce your papers like this..." but it gives the impression that what you have to say is more of an opinion (which it is but bear with me a second).

In your writing you’ll want to be precise and persuasive.

Here’s an example of someone using “I Statements”:

In this paper I am going to discuss and define education through personal ideas. I am going to describe what the government's role is in our education. And finally, I am going to outline what needs to be changed in our current educational system.

If you're like me you're thinking, "Wow, what a treat! I can't wait to read that!" Just kidding. It comes across like a lecture. How many times have you enjoyed being lectured? (And you thought some of your teachers did a lot of lecturing; imagine having to read 30 of these in a class )

Here's a sample not using “I Statements”:

The definition of Education is to impart knowledge on an individual or group. Our current educational system needs to be changed for a number of reasons, and the government bears the responsibility for some of those changes.

See the difference? If you state your opinion as fact it automatically becomes more persuasive as if you are the authority speaking on the topic. So, while it's still an opinion, it comes across as a little more authoritative; which is what you want when you're trying to give your thoughts on a topic.

It will force you to take out any of the fluff and rely on the actual opinion being discuss. Notice how it would pretty much delete your entire introductory paragraph? That means you’ll have to interest your reader through facts, statistics, or other means. Hooking your reader in the first few lines is a challenge, but doing it by talking about what you are going to do can turn them away.

Want some practice? Go dig up just about any essay or speech you've written in the past and re-write the Intro and Conclusion taking out any reference to yourself and your reader. (Yup, that too.)

By taking out the references to the reader, you are also taking away any blatant language that sounds like you're telling them what to do.

Not convinced? Try writing your paper the old way, then go back and revise it removing any I, me, you words and tell us how you think it compares.

Now get back to work...